For a long time I've imagined a family of 5. I'm not sure why, but I've always had a feeling I would have 3 children. When you're in your late (oh so late) 30s and still don't have a child, it's hard to hold out hope that you will one day have three children, and yet, I allow myself to imagine the possibility. When I picture my imaginary children, they all join our family in very different ways. Perhaps we will be matched with a birth mother through our American agency, maybe we will welcome another child through the foster care system and then there is always a third option: private domestic adoption.
Private domestic adoption is a particular challenge in our province since soliciting is illegal. In fact, it's illegal in most Canadian provinces with the exception of Ontario and British Columbia (to my knowledge). All private adoptions in New Brunswick are made through word of mouth. The birth mother must approach the person or couple looking to adopt. While this can be frustrating for families hoping to adopt, it must be incredibly challenging for birth mothers. It saddens me that a woman who realises she can't raise her child and makes the difficult decision of choosing adoption, doesn't have resources available to choose the people who will adopt her child. I truly believe in the birth mother's right to choose. If she has the courage to place, she has the wisdom and right to choose her child's parents.
Since word of mouth is our only option for a private domestic adoption, I need to keep talking about it and you need to talk about it. You never know who might be looking for a family for their child... it might be your co-worker's daughter or your second cousin twice removed... all I know is, the more I talk about it, the more chances we have of becoming the imaginary family I have in my heart.
I don't think what I'm doing today is soliciting, but if it is, PLEASE let me know so I can delete this post. I would never want to do something that would compromise any potential adoption.
Private domestic adoption is a particular challenge in our province since soliciting is illegal. In fact, it's illegal in most Canadian provinces with the exception of Ontario and British Columbia (to my knowledge). All private adoptions in New Brunswick are made through word of mouth. The birth mother must approach the person or couple looking to adopt. While this can be frustrating for families hoping to adopt, it must be incredibly challenging for birth mothers. It saddens me that a woman who realises she can't raise her child and makes the difficult decision of choosing adoption, doesn't have resources available to choose the people who will adopt her child. I truly believe in the birth mother's right to choose. If she has the courage to place, she has the wisdom and right to choose her child's parents.
Since word of mouth is our only option for a private domestic adoption, I need to keep talking about it and you need to talk about it. You never know who might be looking for a family for their child... it might be your co-worker's daughter or your second cousin twice removed... all I know is, the more I talk about it, the more chances we have of becoming the imaginary family I have in my heart.
I don't think what I'm doing today is soliciting, but if it is, PLEASE let me know so I can delete this post. I would never want to do something that would compromise any potential adoption.